Florida Mediator Tip: Stay Focused on the Solution

Patrick Russell
Sep 3
2 min read

How many times have you started making progress during negotiations at a mediation, only for it to unwind and have to start all over? You were on the cusp of an agreement, and then you find yourself in a series of endless rabbit holes chasing past grievances, unmet expectations, and rising emotions. So what happened?

The Detour from Progress During Negotiation

Every legal problem has a personal and emotional component. We are, after all, human.

It is often hard to separate the people from the problem. The legal problem can be mixed with the personal issues of character, competency, honesty, and integrity. When those issues are challenged during a legal case, people tend to take those matters personally, emotions can run high, and this can derail any progress made during a negotiation.

Similarly, parties may find themselves at some point during mediation wanting vindication, revenge, or unable to let go of a perceived slight or wrong. When this arises, we find ourselves on a detour from the progress we made towards resolution.

Activate Problem-Solving During Mediation

the rational and emotional sides of the brain

Neuroscience supports the idea that to avoid negotiation detours, you need to stay focused on the solution to the problem.

The human brain has both thinking and feeling components, but usually they do not activate and work at the same time. When we are emotionally triggered, we typically do not make good rational decisions.

On the other hand, when the mind is focused on solutions, the rational problem-solving component kicks in, and this keeps emotions and other extraneous issues at bay. This is why focusing on solutions is so vital to making progress during a negotiation.

Florida Mediation Tip: Focus is Your Superpower

When the parties start revisiting the problem more than the solution, it is time to change gears.

This is akin to looking at your rearview mirror while driving. You become distracted by what is behind you, and you lose sight of what is in front. This can lead to disastrous results and a crash.

Same as during a negotiation. Rehashing the problem, airing grievances, and letting emotions fly will undo the good work of what has already been achieved during your negotiation.

Preparing the parties to remain steadfast in their pursuit of solving the common problem that brought them together for the mediation is the most effective way to find a resolution. If they should stray from this objective, it is imperative to reinforce and restate the goal to focus on solutions during mediation. If mediation does not work out, there will be another day and forum for the airing of grievances and seeking vindication.

The Takeaway

Preparing the parties to stay focused on solutions during mediation is the most effective way towards resolution. Focusing on solutions activates the rational side of our brain, which is best equipped to gather information and make informed decisions. By doing so, the parties avoid any unnecessary detours that divert them from a resolution, including emotional entanglements, unmet expectations, and past grievances.

Less dispute. More resolution.